Saturday, June 7, 2014

Little Baby

Losing my little boy was one of the hardest personal challenges I have been thorough. I was never sure if his short little time growing inside of me could be counted as coming to earth and getting a body - one of God's major purposes for His children. When I found out I was pregnant again, I was so grateful. We all thought It was a boy! I allowed myself to hope that it was him, coming back to me.
We just had an ultra sound and we are having a girl! Of course we are thrilled to be having a little girl. We will love her with all our hearts. She is healthy and all looks well!
In some ways, it has been like losing my little boy all over again. I had really hoped it was him. I am having to work though new and resurfacing emotions. There are so many questions. So many things I don't know and that I don't understand. Was there really a spirit connected with his tiny body? Will I get him again in this life? Will I ever have him at all? So many things I just don't know. The older I get the more I don't know! BUT here is what I DO know for sure.  I know that God is in His Heaven. I know He loves His children. I know He is aware of little old me and that He has a plan for me. I have felt His presence and of this love over and over again undeniably though out my life, in many different ways. I know He sent His Son, Jesus Christ to die for me and all of us. I know through Them, all our deepest wounds can be healed. All that is unfair about life will be made right. I know very little, but this I KNOW, I can trust in my loving Heavenly Father.
So here is to headbands and frills, to pink and lace.
Can't wait to meet you sweet baby girl!